Validation can come from other people, but it can also come from the individual themselves. Self-validation involves recognizing and accepting your own thoughts and feelings.
Emotional validation plays a number of important roles. Some of the benefits include:. Emotional invalidation can have a number of negative consequences in terms of psychological, behavioral, and emotional health.
Some of the damaging effects of this invalidation include:. Individuals with BPD can have very strong emotional responses to events that seem minor to outside observers.
As a result, people with BPD frequently experience emotional invalidation —that is, others react to their emotions as if those emotions are not valid or reasonable.
There are some things that you can do to make sure that you are validating the emotions of others effectively. Improving this skill can not only improve your relationships with others, it can also help you learn how to validate your own thoughts and feelings.
When you validate an emotional response, the first step is to acknowledge the emotion that the other person is having. This can be hard if the other person has not clearly communicated their feelings, so you may have to either ask them what they are feeling, or guess and then ask them if you are right. Imagine that your loved one is angry with you. You come home from work, and they are behaving angrily even if they are not explicitly stating it.
The next step is to identify the situation or cue that triggered the emotion. Ask the person what is causing their response. Your loved one may or may not be able to communicate this clearly. They may not even understand what is going on, or they may be unwilling to articulate what triggered the emotion. Imagine that your loved one is able to communicate the source of their emotion: They respond that they are angry because you are 15 minutes late coming home from work.
Perhaps to you, their level of anger seems unwarranted given the situation. It was not my intention to anger you; I was stuck in traffic. If you feel strong dislike toward a group of people, a specific person, or toward yourself, consider talking to a therapist about your feelings noticing a theme here? Emotions can be complicated. Some might feel intense, while others seem mild in comparison. You might feel conflicting emotions at any given time.
Instead of trying to change the emotions you experience, consider how you react to them. The emotional symptoms of stress range from depression and anxiety to addition and anger. In most cases, managing your stress will resolve your…. Emotional exhaustion often feels like you have no power or control over what happens in your life.
Lack of energy, poor sleep, and decreased…. Ever feel anxious, depressed, or just plain bad without knowing exactly why? One useful tool to get to the root of lingering negative feelings — and…. Some people believe that they're a newly discovered…. People with echolalia repeat noises and phrases that they hear. Learn more about why this occurs. Saying no may feel aggressive, like you're rejecting the person. Most people do not want to be an aggressor.
There's a negative connotation to it. Or they may feel like the bad guy or gal. They may feel they're letting the person down and feel guilty. Or they may even feel they won't be liked or will be perceived as uncaring and unhelpful. As a result, people usually go the path of least potential conflict and comply with others.
If people do say no, they usually do it in ineffective ways that come with an excuse. For example, they might say, "I'd like to help but I'm really busy.
He or she feels there's an opening. Don't beat around the bush or offer weak excuses or hem and haw. Which one is it? Feel is a verb, so shouldn't what comes after it be—and look like—an adverb?
Like 'be' or 'look', 'feel' is a linking verb. That means that "I feel bad" is correct—just like "I feel sad" rather than "I feel sadly" or "that looks delicious" rather than "that looks deliciously". Feel is a particular kind of verb called a linking verb. Another term for linking verb is copula or copulative verb.
Linking verbs are not like regular action verbs. They function only to connect the subject of a sentence or clause with words that describe or identify that subject. And those words are either adjectives or adjective phrases or nouns or noun phrases.
There are a number of linking verbs in English, among them be , become , seem , and all of the sensory verbs: smell , look , taste , sound , and feel. And while each of these can also be used as an action verb, it's easy to tell when they're being used as linking verbs, as in these cases involving the sensory linking verbs:. Except let's stop at that last one again because, unlike the other "NOT" versions, we do, in fact, hear and read it—and often from people who know their way around an English sentence.
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